Angry mom?  Me?  Yes...I can feel the toxic anger seeping into my body, filling my mind and burning my chest.  I refuse to let it take hold.  I'm desperate to find a solution to not allow my husband's sludge take hold in my life, without removing my husband from the equation.  I can't leave my husband.  I know he is in there somewhere. He's lost in his infection.  His explosions over me missing his phone call, missing a chore, not having enough gas in my van for his unexpected trip into town, or leaving dirty diapers in the bathroom are becoming worse, more frequent and more painful to endure.
Maybe if I can go back to the pre infected period in my life, before the black goo attacked me and latched on like Venom to Spider Man. 
I've been reading a blog, Meet Penny.  She is currently writing a multiple part posts about "Mommy Rage Recovery" .  This is the closest thing I can find to help, especially since I have absolutely nobody to talk to.  After 10 years of my husbands ever negative attitude sucking the life out of me, I need some help.  I've decided to purchase some of the recommended books she's posted. Anything.  Maybe if I can control myself, get a hold of my emotions....then he will stop increasing.  Maybe even get help? Maybe?